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Jan. 21st, 2010


To the one I once loved most...



Baby Dominick<3


Jan. 11th, 2010



I am super fascinated with the whole paranormal world and just the general idea that deceased people are still living among us... If I find enough time, which I don't have much of to spare right now, I might just post the blog all about ghosts and spirits. I am done writing it, it just needs to be revised. Life has been far too chaotic lately, I sometimes feel like I am just visiting my own home :/ I'm not completely happy with the way things are in school and such. I sometimes find myself wondering if things will ever be the same again... All I have to hold on to is the hope that someday, I'll find what I am looking for. I think I am finally on the right track. I am glad to have the best boyfriend ever, someone I really love and think we "click" haha. My life is going quite well other than the school bullshit. I am rather happy that I only have a year or two left. Overall, I am just glad I found someone I really love and want to be with, I havent felt this way about anyone in so long... I love him so much.

Jan. 9th, 2010



Do you have an agenda? yes i do
Whats your favorite style of music? deathcore! 
Have you ever been to a concert? Many! :D
What do you worry about most? Failing in school, I try really hard to do well.
Do you have a best friend of the opposite sex? Yeah
How many animals do you have? three
Have you ever done drugs? naw
Do you like sleep overs? of course!
Whats the prettiest girls name in your opinion? alexandria jade... :D
Are you canadian? nope
Whats your screen name? alexandria villanueva
Do you cry about the past? nope
What month is your birthday in? june 
Listening to any music? yeah, i am listening to iwrestledabearonce
Do you use hand lotion? sometimes
Whats your favorite perfume? midnight by britney spears 
Do you prefer laptops or desktops? laptops
Do you like country music? noooo.
What color is your bra? purple and black :D
How many piercings do you have? four
Who makes you weak in the knees? i dont know
Do you have a hero? yeah
Do you like remix's? sometimes
Whats the reason for the smile you last had on your face? Kevin told me he loves me :D that makes me smile everytime...  
Are you protective? Yeah to an extent
Can someone tell how you feel, by your facial reactions? not really. 
Do you think rap is sexist? eh, i dont pay attention.
Whats your favorite color for an ipod? purple :D 
Have you ever kissed on a plane? Hmmm. i dont think soo
When you see old couples, do you smile? sometimes
Do you believe that you can love at any age? yeah
Do you remember when the last time you went sledding was? yeah 
Do you like winter? i love it
Whats your favorite holiday? halloween <3 
So, are you in school? not at the moment
Have you ever been abused in any way? yeah i have, many times :/
Do you miss elementary? not really
What is your dream job? hair stylist
How many people do you fully trust? only one... 
Have you ever smoked? nope
Who is the stupidest person on TV? eh i dont watch TV so idk 
Do you love yourself? yeah
Is it easy for you to open up to people? naw 
Who was the last person to lie down beside you? kadee 
How are you feeling? tired
Do you write poems? yeah
Who did you last look at? my sister
Are you moody? hah somewhat
Are you scared of falling in love? nope because i am in love now.. 
Do you keep your promises? i try to
Are you complicated? not really
Who did you last promise something to? Kevin, I promised that I would love him forever
Whats something you learned today? that drag car races are obnoxiously long... :/
Do years go by too fast? not always
Whose eyes do you admire most? mine.
Do you smile a lot? eh, not too much but its not once in a blue moon, so I guess?
Do you quote song lyrics in your status? not too much
Have you ever just not called someone, because you wanted them to call you? mhmm 
Who have you lost this year? many people
Do thunderstorms scare you? nope
Do you like taking pictures of yourself? yeah
Have you done anything illegal? yeah 
Whats your favorite kind of car? spyder GT <3
What compliment do you get most? something about my hair and eyes, or how skinny I am
Are you shorter than most of your friends? yeah :/
Have you ever dyed your hair? yes, far too often D;
Do you like looking at the stars? yeah!
Have you ever been on TV? at schoool
Can you do sign language? yeah some 
Do you have any pictures of you & your ex(s)? yeah 
How long do you work for? 8-10 hours
Do you like the beach? eh, not very much bc i live near it.
So, do you have a lover? mhmm
Have you ever sent a hand written letter to anyone? yeah
How many times have you travelled by plane? a lot
Whats the hottest halloween costume youve seen on someone? i dunno 
Are you ready to have kids? not yet
What kind of phone does your crush have? i dunno 
When did you last burp? i dont recall
Did the person you like today wear something sexy? i dont know, i dont see him 
Have you ever gotten your future told? yeah i tell myself my own future and its always kevin kevin kevin
Are you bored? somewhat
What instrument do you wish you could play? drums? 
Do you have good grammar? yeah
Have you ever written a book? nope
Is your internet slow? no(:
Are you hiding a secret from anyone? kinda 
Do you like family guy? not really
Who do you go to for advice? my momma
Who or what is mostly on your mind? kevin kevin kevin and more kevin, he is always on my mind
How big is your bed? too big for just me. 
When was the last time you went skating? a month or two ago. 
What are you doing right now? listening to music, taking this.
Is makeup attractive? yeah
How can someone make you cry? they dont make me, i chose to do it myself... but idk 
Whats your goal for 2010? to keep a boyfriend for a really long time
If you could have dinner with anyone in the world, who would you pick? kevin<3 
Do quotes inspire you? sometimes
When you were with the one you like, what was on your mind? i havent been with him yet :/ 
Would you kiss the last person you talked to? noooo. haha
Do you like answering questions? sometimes
Do you wonder if the one you love, loves you back? i know he does<3 
What are you logged into right now? formspring, livejournal, and twitter
Do you like beer? naw 
What time is it? 5 35
How long do you have until your birthday? a few months
Has anyone ever said they loved you other then family or friends? mhmm 
Who is your favorite disney character? i dont know
Do you get tanned easily? not really
Do you regret anything? nope
Have you ever owned a 'bop it'? yeah, haha 
Who lies a lot? everyone around me
Why did you last run? to get home faster
How can someone make you truly happy? he is the only one that can do that <3 
What is your birth stone? alexandria i think XD

Dec. 21st, 2009


Alexabears loves Keviebear always and forever<3

Kevin Skylar Rana, the love of my life(:
He stole my heart on 10.6.2009 and we started going out on January 5, 2010<3
I have never met anyone as sweet as you, not even close. You make me super happy on my saddest days. No one else can do that to me. Hearing your voice keeps me sane. Talking to you is better than anything else in this world. You always know you right things to say to me and make me so happy I cant even explain it. Im so lucky to have met someone like you, you really are one of a kind. I'll probably never meet another person like you, but I dont need to. You are the only guy I need in my life, I love you so much babe.
There is no length of time that's too long or no distance that is too far I love you more than life itself I'll wait for you till the day I die
I'll never forget the poems you wrote me:
To Tell You That I Love You
The one thing that can't escape my mind,
Me thinking of all of the reasons I love you.
Paint pictures, wishes form of you
Holding me close in your arms.
Nights spent dreaming, thinking of sweet
Things to say to you, telling you I love you.
Whispered thoughts and talking on the phone with you,
Laughing and giggling together.
Hopeful thoughts of a future with each other,
Spend side by side never forgetting I love you's.
Always thinking of some way I could possibly see you,
The distance means nothing to me.
Days drag on, minutes spent not talking
To you seem like hours. Always waiting to hear I love you.
All these silly talking, Never fail to make me smile.
I dream of the day I can stare into your hazel
Colored eyes, to show I mean it when I say "I love you."
You honestly wouldn't believe how much I talk about you.
This distance thing, sucks so much.
One day we'll get to hold each other,
And I'll never EVER let you go. I love you.
Thinking about you
every moment of day
thinking of something
i could say
to tell you how much
i love you so
if i could
i just don't know
i love you so much
its so hard to explain
but i do and it
drives me insane
to have you not
and to feel this way
its real hard
i miss my baby.
you my love
are my everything
my light my world
my dream my sweet girl.
i love everything about you
everything and more
i love the lil' things you do,
which i so much adore
never will i find anyone
close to you
never will i ever want
to replace you,
you forever
thats my need
don't want it any other way
ill beg on my knees
cause it hard enough
not having you now
but in my heart
your safe and sound
you my dear
my hug alexabear
everything i love about you
i swear
and if true love
feels this way
then I'm drowning in a pool
of it everyday.
i miss you my love
wishing your were here
so i could whisper one thing
into your ear
that would be so true
i would say that i
forever ill love you...
Or the pictures you made me:

And most of all, I will never forget how much I love you.
Forever yours, Alexabear<3

Dec. 16th, 2009



For so many years I held my breath for you,
held under what became the ocean.
I'm struggling to find footing,
on what became the ocean floor.
Now as I reflect on what became of
my foundation, I realize that I am lost.
Who am I to say the grass was ever greener
where my own feet struck the earth?
And that the fields they seemed much neater,
on my side of the fence?
And who am I to question the path you took?
Who the fuck am I to open this closed book?
But the pages just keep turning,
and my pen just won't run dry.
But my eyes they won't stop burning,
and yet you still have no reply.
I guess that in a way,
it had to be like this.
And I guess that in a way,
I'm glad it turned out like it did.
Because I couldn't stand your sight,
if I ran into you tonight.

Nov. 18th, 2009



I have really been slacking on this and I am sorry to all of you that keep up with it. This week has been busy. Monday I hungout with Corey and we went to Subway, yesterday my mom had her birthday celebration at Kobe's Steakhouse, mmmm. Today will be chaotic too because I am hanging out with Dominick(: I'm excited. I also ran two miles, then biked two miles all in one shot yesterday with my mom. My grandma joined us for the lovely dinner :D Today has just been the usual. We had the hour lunch and I hung out with Corey and Dominick. I had to beg Corey's forgiveness for feeding someone else. He was not happy with me for a while. I love Wednesdays. Well, I'm wasn't intending this to be too long so I'm going to wrap it up(:<3

Nov. 15th, 2009



Well I got a lot done yesterday for my Mom's birthday which is today. I cleaned my whole house by myself because my sister and brother annoyed me to the point where I said FUCK IT and then I did it all myself. Then, my Grandma showed up and brought balloons to put up and such. We already had streamers so I went all out and added a giant sign made on a poster board. My mom was, in fact, happy when she came home really late. She will be even happier today because we got her that DJ Hero game for Xbox 360 that she is just dying to play and I went and made her a calendar with pics of me and family(: Today has been quite chaotic so far, my sister is eating pizza rolls as fast as I can cook them... Ahahha. I miss Corey dearly because we haven't hung out together as much as usual (erryday) this week :/ Hopefully I will see him more next week :D<3 Tuesday night, the whole family is going to Kobe's Steakhouse. I cannot wait because that is one of my favourite restaurants. My sister is annoying the shit out of me, so Ima go :/

Nov. 14th, 2009



Yesterday was indeed, an adventure. Tonight will be as well. I have been up since 7 am to go "Scouting for Food" with my brother. It is some boy-scouts thing that is collecting food for the homeless. We lost half our group so I had to drive around for half an hour through the neighborhood, l0l. I came home, although being tired, I ate lunch. Since my Mom's birthday is tomorrow, I'm cleaning the house super good tonight and decorating. She will be home after midnight so it works out :D I have tons to do so I guess I'll get started.

Nov. 13th, 2009



Soon, life is going to suck, really bad. My best friend, that brightens my days and cheers me up when I am down, is dropping out. I am going to see her more outside of school but I'll miss being in school with her. I love her really much. Haha. I have been busy lately so I don't get on much. I had a lovely day with Corey on Wednesday. We actually finished all of our French homework and then we went to Kystals. MMM. He handled the annoying DirectTV issue. They call us constantly and we have Brighthouse so it makes no sense. He is fun to be with. Yesterday, I stayed after school yesterday to finish up my Mom's birthday gift. Her birthday is Sunday. (: I went home yesterday and had so much things to accomplish, that I didn't get a chance to hangout with Corey D; I think that was the first time in two weeks that we haven't hung out. I might try to hangout with him and Dominic soon :D Bri and I are in the process of making plans for next week. Fun fun fun. I miss her so so much. We kinda claimed this abandoned house across the street from my busstop but a few days ago, I believe someone broke into it. No one has lived there for the longest time and the door was open at like 6AM :o Haha, anyways. I still haven't got a call from Sean about the letter I wrote. Michael said he was writing me back (What a shock) Oh well :/ I don't know anymore. I also got annoyed at people asking me if I use Bumpits. NOOO asshole, I wake up at 5 AM every morning just to put Bumpits in my hair -__- Agh. Whatever. I'm sorta moody today, hopefully later today I will get better. <3

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